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| Paula Deen on the Today show |
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Hello Valorie, Love your blog.
ReplyDeleteI keep thinking she's saying one thing and acts another way in real life? I don't know why I feel that way. I have her books and have been to the restaurants too(bubba's was awful)she has a lot of handlers ,maybe this is why?
I think she's very sorry for screwing up her "brand" not for saying the "n " word in the past,(if it was the past)
The complaint is out there online and it's bad.Bottom line she is the head of the co. that's responsible.It(the court case) will work itself out and hopefully the working environment in the restaurants will be better for it.
Stephanie
Agree with Anon. She messed up X10 & it's hurting her pocketbook. Do not think she would care otherwise. I've always thought she was a big fake anyway.
ReplyDeleteI think there's been a huge rush to sit in judgement! Of those who did the firing, surely at least one of them has called someone a name. A really bad name, perhaps? A racial slur? Are their hands lily white? I sincerely doubt it. And the same goes for any of us who are so quick to condemn from the sidelines - something I'll readily admit to. I've said LOTS in the past that I'd love to rephrase and I hope none it comes back to bite me in the rear! Maybe that's why I'm not so anxious to tar and feather Ms. Deen. Not yet, at least.
ReplyDeleteYes, the complaint is out there and it's bad. Think it could be someone looking for an opportunity to "cash in"? It usually is.
Your comment says it the way Deen might: "Are their hands lily white?" "Not so anxious to tar and feather" Words matter and not just the N word, dear.
DeleteIt's about her world view of an idealized and romanticized period of slavery and Jim Crow; her wistfulness about those times COMBINED WITH the imposition of those views on her employees in a bigoted environment. Deen is 66 years old? Born in 1947, but reaching adulthood after the Civil Rights Act. She should know better. She does know better.
Words, do indeed, matter. Since I don't know Paula Deen I would never pretend to know how she views anything. That would, in a manner of speaking, be putting words in her mouth. The period of Jim Crow and slavery could never be idealized or romanticized and it's unfair to even suggest that Ms. Deen feels that way. Have you eaten at her restaurant? Been an employee of hers? Been an object of her bigotry? If not, all you can do is assume. Unless you know her (I don't and you probably don't) you can't speak with any certainty about how she sees anything. This is a problem - too many people assume they know all about the situation when they know only what they've been fed by the media. She's been tried and convicted without due process by assumptions.
DeleteWords may matter, but aren't we taking it a bit far when time worn phrases such as "lily white" (often used to describe wedding gowns) and "tar and feather" (which goes back to the Revolutionary times) cannot be written or spoken without someone trying to infer some nefarious meaning? Really!!
DeleteWhoever is handling Paula is doing a poor job. She is not good in front of a camera unless she is talking about food and preparing a dish. She is not that well educated nor is she particularly articulate. She did poorly on The Today Show and I think it caused additional bleeding. Her sons, however, did a very impressive job in their interview by both defending their mother's character and her generosity within the community. A Savannah minister who is black has also come out to support her because of his personal relationship with her and her work with the Bethesda Boys Home. I am not a fan, but I see reverse discrimination on steroids in this situation and it's not pretty. I believe we should hold all people to the same standards of speech and conduct in our society. I am happy to see that her latest cookbook is No. 1 on Amazon because it speaks to the fairness which most people want to ascribe to this situation. I think we should wait to make our judgment after more facts and/or testimony under oath comes out at the trial of this lawsuit. Anything less is mere speculation.
I think she needs a new stylist.
ReplyDeleteYou got that right!
DeleteWhat hypocrisy to fire someone (and have this make headline news) for the very common slip-up of using a derogatory term. No one denies that name-calling is rude, but I cannot believe that all the people criticizing Paula Deen have never made a single mistake! And, for goodness' sake, she apologized--several times. If there are that many PERFECT people out there, what a wonderful world this is. Maybe the major TV networks and newspapers feel it's easier to hype up something like this than to do in-depth, serious reporting on serious problems in the world.
ReplyDeleteNo one seems to give her credit for telling the truth. Matt Laurer practically made fun of her for not fudging on her answers in her deposition. We are being lied to daily by government officials and yet even when suspended as was Lois Lerner of the IRS, they remain on the government payroll. At least Paula didn't take the 5th.
DeleteShe seemed to be crying a lot but I saw no tears till the very end. When I first heard about this scandal...I thought oh...they are making a big deal about something she once said or taken out of context. But then I saw the video of her in an interview where she was asked about black relations and she called for a man that works for her to come over. She said..."He's as black as that wall behind me and I love him." She asked him to come over but said to him."Don't stand in front of that wall...you won't be seen." That for me tells me she is a racist. She does not think she is...but she is. I'm not saying she is a bad person and I bet she truly does love that man. But she sees his color first and loves him inspite of it. My Grandmother was the sweetest person in the world but she was a racist too....and might have said something similar. Her views came from never being exposed to other races and learning from her parents to fear them. She was also quit a bit older than Paula...she'd be over 100 now if alive.
ReplyDeleteI'm not a big Paula Deen fan...but I have nothing against her at all. I think she is very pretty. I admire her fun personality. I'm not in to her style of cooking...at all...having grown up with fried and fattening foods....they are not what I like to eat. But I do hope she can turn her situation around. I hope this has been an eye opener for her but I'm afraid it has not been. In the Today interview she seemed to think this was all being done to her rather than accept that she may have done something wrong and own it.
Again that video I saw of her talking about her very black friend is what really swayed my view. But I do hope she learns and grows from this and can come back.
A racist is someone who is prejudiced again another race. They are intolerant of another race. They believe they are racially superior to people of another race. Ms. Deen's comments, while they may be a bit tasteless, indicate in no way that she thinks she's better than this man nor that she has animosity towards him. Maybe they are close enough that they joke with one another this way. If she "sees his color and loves him in spite of it", she's not a racist. The word "racist" is used far too often without any thought to the actual meaning of the word.
DeleteWhy would anyone have to love someone IN SPITE of their color?
DeleteWhy would anyone have to ask a question because s/he's comprehension of the written word is flawed?
DeleteNowhere the phrase says that "anyone have to love someone IN SPITE of their color."
You inserted the HAVE because of your personal prejudices, or perhaps because you are a troll.
Once again . . . assumptions are made due to a choice of someone else's words. So judgemental and it has no basis.
DeleteWell said! That is exactly how I see it!!!!
DeleteAnyone who sees someone and loves them IN SPITE of their color (who cares if I inserted the word HAVE, that has nothing to do with anything) is not seeing the person of color as an equal. I have no idea if Paula Deen actually said this but anon 3:11 did and I am disagreeing.
DeleteI am no more a troll than you are anon 6:11. This is my opinion.
I agree that sometimes people joke. Sometimes people have a good enough friendship, there is respect there, each person knows (KNOWS) the other cares about them. In this instance "joking" is okay. It is NOT a JOKE and NOT ok if there is no EQUALITY.
It is my understanding the Paula Deen told her EMPLOYEE that he was as black as a wall, and not to stand in front of the black wall nobody would see him. She apparently said this in a joking way, and I am sure she did feel she was joking. IF Paula and this employee have a deep and abiding friendship this might be ok, this might be a joke. IF there is equality it is ok. IF the employee felt free to say something to Paula (HIS BOSS) along the lines of "oh paula you pudgy thing, you are so fat don't stand in front of that round mixing bowl" IF he felt free to say something like that then Paula may have been joking, they may have a teasing back and forth relationship based on true friendship. If this kind of friendship was not in place, then Paula, who felt she was joking actually was not joking at all. A boss should know better. Just the fact that she thought that was ok does say SOMETHING.
I have always kind of liked Paula Deen, her fun personality. I don't know all the facts but this does trouble me. Racism is NOT always about treating someone in a BLATANTLY unfair way, it is often subtle and the subtle forms of racism should not be left unaddressed.
I use to live in Knoxville TN and one day I was at the downtown barber shop and heard city officials referring to MLK day as Nday but not with malice, just "oh how's your Nday?" like there was nothing odd about the fact they were sitting around in a public space with total strangers saying such things. It might be wrong but it's how things are down there. The Paula Deen thing seems blown out but if it wakes people up a bit they might think twice before they blur out stuff like that.
ReplyDeletePlease read my reply about "things down there." It exists, but is not acceptable to most of us.
DeleteI'm not sure what to think of all this, it seems to me it's Paula Deen season, out to get her. First the bit about her health issues, and now this. Would that we could all be perfect. It would be great. If you don't like her, don't go to her restaurant, don't buy her cookbooks etc. I think why wasn't this brought up at the time of incident, not wait till she has $ to pay judgement. I hate media that first build a star and then pluck it out of the sky.
ReplyDeleteof all the comments, i'd have to say i agree with you the most. while calling anyone a "name" is cruel and hateful, i'd like to meet one person who hasn't.
Deletebut what i find interesting about this case is the person who filled the lawsuit worked for P.D. for 2 or so years and then decided to sue. why on earth didn't they leave after the first insult?
money .. money .. money ..
What happened to innocent until proven guilty-ha!
ReplyDeleteI am not a huge fan of Paula Dean but everyone deserves a fair shake.
This is all written from my rural Georgia vantage point.
ReplyDeleteFirst, let me say that I saw a good article today that helped me understand when this was said, who to, etc. http://townhall.com/columnists/larryelder/2013/06/27/if-paula-deen-is-out-please-explain-maher-and-sharpton-n1628452
I have always lived in the deep south- many, many years in rural Georgia. There are people like her out there. It is passed down from the parents. My mother is 72 and grew up in rural South Georgia like Paula Deen, yet I have never heard that word come out of her mouth nor have I used it. I've never heard an aunt or uncle use it. I think it is all about upbringing and what is acceptable in your family.
Here is a good quote from that article I referenced: "White racism exists," said John O'Sullivan. "But its social power is weak; the social power against it, overwhelming."
Racist attitudes are the minority, but were very prevalent in the democratic party for many, many generations after the war until the federal government stopped it in the 60's, thanks to MLK. We moved to Georgia in the early 1980s- I was in High School- and they still had segregated proms at our local high school - it was like stepping back in time. My mom called the school board about the obvious problem and they gave their list of reasons and pretty much let her know she was outnumbered. Switching back to the 60s - keep in mind that the South was solidly democratic during the 60's and the democrats in congress actively opposed civil rights legislation. To this day across the deep south there are small private schools that were formed in the 60's, once desegregation occurred. (read: parents continuing to teach racism as they placed their little ones in schools that the black families could not afford). Most of these schools were not strong academically. The segregation academies (private schools) formed during the 60's didn't help the attitude any, and has (in my opinion) led to a sharp decline in education throughout the South, as elitist parents put their kids in sub-par private schools and left the public schools to flounder.
That being said, shouldn't we grant her grace if she no longer thinks that way? Just sayin'. She is apparently a huge supporter of President Obama, so I would guess that any former prejudice she may have harbored has vanished as it has for many in the deep South. And she has quite the American story - an inspirational story- working her way from an impoverished single-parenthood situation to her successful empire.
Soapbox speech complete.
Well, I think she's in deep doo-doo.
ReplyDeleteI've got her books, I subscribed in the past to her magazine, I've watched her shows. I think as her empire grew, maybe it grew a little
too big. Her magazine became one big advertisement for the Deens. I missed her column on the back page, much like Oprah did/does in her magazine, where Paula gave us her brief thoughts about life. Then she
quit doing that. I felt like the whole Deen thing became one big corporate machine and the business angle took over but, you know, she was always a businesswoman before she ever became famous.
Who knows the real person when you get things in little "bytes" (not to make a pun) on utube, on cable, in print. I've liked her story and how she grew out of a reclusive state to be a woman out there in the world; she seemed to find great happiness. I don't know much of the South although my roots 'way back are there in Louisiana, Georgia, Alabama, Mississippi. She may have grown up around language that was heard, no matter how horrendous, in the 1930s-1940s; I heard one of my distant, elderly relatives refer to a brazil nut as a "n-toe" and I remember saying to my mother, "what does he mean, Mom?" (this would have been the 1950s) and she replied, "do not EVER repeat that; he said a bad thing." (She like me, native Californians; he was from rural Texas, not that the state has anything to do with it when, of course, it's to do with the upbringing...but I have to tell you, this man was college-educated, a church-goer, a husband/father, responsible person, etc. What in the world does it reach back to? Without-thinking "sayings" of previous generations who lived in the South when blacks were 'The Help' and who were disciminated against because of their color? Unkindness and bias that we today can't fathom?)
I have to say that I didn't like the way the whole diabetes thing seemed like one big cover-up with the sponsor/advertiser. That didn't sit right with me.
I wanted to buy her new cookbook that's not published yet. I figured it
would be handy and helpful. I mean, I like her; she seems like a loving and sincere woman in so many ways.
Maybe as one commenter said, too many handlers? Really bad guidance; really poor judgment on her part.
I shouldn't think "on paper" for risk of not describing the multi-layed issue with any kind of real value here. But you did get me to thinking more on it.
Then there's the over-thinking it. Dunno. Verdict's still out. But I think she's toast. Martha Stewart rose from the ashes.
I want to thank all my readers who have left comments for being considerate and keeping the discussion relevant, thoughtful, and respectful.
ReplyDeleteYou are the best.
xo xo